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Added on April 23, 2014

Last night’s group Mindfulness class was commenced with a discussion of the Art of Forgiveness.

You probably think of forgiveness as letting go of anger towards someone or something, and it’s certainly that, but also more.

Forgiveness is learning to accept, or even be comfortable with not getting what you wanted, what you thought you deserved.

If your partner cheated on you, you may not want to forgive because you thought you deserve fidelity. If a business partner stole from you, you may not want to forgive because you thought you deserved trust. If a friend lied to you, you may not want to forgive because you thought you deserved honesty.

You wanted fidelity, honesty, trust but you didn’t get them. And you’re probably experiencing grief as a result.¬†Forgiveness is not about denying that grief or forgetting the injustice. It’s not about turning the other cheek and pretending the hurt didn’t happen. It’s about accepting that we don’t always get what we want and no longer punishing ourselves for this. After all, ¬†being angry is like drinking a cup of poison and expecting the other person to get sick from it. The person who wronged you may be off relaxing on a beach somewhere and you’re still stewing in your pain. Forgiveness is about releasing yourself from the pain of clinging to wanting what you didn’t get.

As Jack Kornfield says, forgiveness is letting go of all hope of a better past!

We continue this discussion at our next group Mindfulness session on Tuesday 6 May at 7pm. Bookings essential as space is limited.

About Judith Lissing

Judith Lissing is a Clinical Hypnotherapist and Wellness Coach, with 15 years experience in teaching stress management and meditation. She holds a Bachelor of Science degree with Honours in Immunology and a Masters degree in Public Health, both from the University of NSW. She is also an Associate Lecturer in the Faculty of Medicine at the University of NSW since 1999. Judith is trained in Wellness Coaching with Wellcoaches U.S. and holds a Diploma in Hypnotherapy. Prior to coaching professionally, Judith held a statewide management role with NSW Health working with all levels of staff across the health sector.

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